Answers to more than 1000 questions on psychology and mental health. Free medical advice on mental health, psychology, personality disorders, relationships, stress, anxiety, depression, emotional abuse, substance abuse, sexual abuse, types of mental illness, etc.

Psychology Free Online Medical Advice

Picture of happy people
Answers to more than 1000 questions about psychology, mental health, healthy living and relationships, written by a team of experts appointed by the Commission of the European Communities.
Psychology
Free
Online
Medical
Advice
Written by a team of experts appointed by the Commission of the European communities.
Ask our intelligent question-answering system
Ask a simple question in one sentence (Note: Our answers are not oriented towards somatic - body - medicine): More info
Ask our intelligent question-answering system
Ask a simple question in one sentence (Note: Our answers are not oriented towards somatic - body - medicine):
Local help Info
Categories
Addiction Healthy living Psychotherapy
ADHD Personality disorders Relations
Anorexia Life Sex
Anxiety, Panic, OCD Mood swings Sleeping problems
Bulimia Obesity Stress symptoms
Child care Phobia Treatment
Depression Psychiatric drugs Workplace
Disclaimer: The documents contained in this web site are presented for information purposes only. The material is in no way intended to replace professional medical care or attention by a qualified psychiatrist or psychotherapist. The material in this web site cannot and should not be used as a basis for diagnosis or choice of treatment. If you find something which should be corrected, please write to

RECENT DISCUSSIONS
01 Nov 10:59
Re: Telling partner about STI
09 Nov 07:58
How to Get From "I don
24 Dec 22:00
Can I overcome my shyness?
25 Dec 02:31
Helplessness
Langu-
ages
German flag
Deutsch
English flag
English
Greek flag
Farsi
Greek flag
Greek
Italian flag
Italiano
Polish flag
Polski
Finnish flag
Suomi
Swedish flag
Svenska

We comply with the HONcode standard for trustworthy health
information:
verify here. HON evaluates the quality and trustworthiness of medical web sites, and the logo above shows that HON has approved Web4Health.
We comply with the HONcode standard for trustworthy health information: verify here. HON evaluates the quality and trustworthiness of medical web sites, and this logo shows that HON has approved Web4Health.
whitefiller
         Site map | About us | Contact us | Medical experts | Communities | Join us | External reviews | Your privacy | Rules | Advanced search | Forums | My account | Unseen

This web site in other languages:
white filler

RECENT DISCUSSIONS
01 Nov 10:59
Re: Telling partner about STI
09 Nov 07:58
How to Get From "I don
24 Dec 22:00
Can I overcome my shyness?
25 Dec 02:31
Helplessness




Copyright Web4Health 2003-2015 Stockholm (Sweden), Lüneburg (Germany), Ioannina (Greece), Goes (Netherlands), Rimini (Italy)

The aim of Web4Health is to give good and useful free medical advice, help and self help in the areas of mental health, psychology, personality disorders, relationships, stress, anxiety, depression, emotional abuse, substance abuse, sexual abuse, types of mental illness, etc.

Below is an example from our data base. This example will be automatically replaced about twice an hour.


white filler
white filler

Saying Yes When You Really Mean No

Written by: Gunborg Palme, certified psychologist and certified psychotherapist, teacher and tutor in psychotherapy.

First version: 22 Jul 2008. Latest revision: 17 Aug 2008.

Question:

 

I have been a compulsive eater for many years, but I have now decided to stop. For almost two weeks it has gone very well. This evening however, I sat here and felt awful and sad. It all began at 3 p.m. today. Peter arrived here to have coffee with me; he was formerly my workmate. I don't know him very well. I thought it was a totally pointless visit as I don't get anything out of talking to him. I don't know whether I sense that Peter is interested in me, but I am not at all interested in him.

Then I went to visit my mother who has recently had an operation and been unable to work, which she finds boring and depressing. I became terribly hungry when I was there and ate cottage cheese and yoghurt. In the evening I had arranged to meet my friend James in town. I felt very restless and worried and a longing for goodies came irresistibly over me. I tried to lie down and relax, but couldn't, perhaps because my mother was sitting here. I told her that I could just as well go into town earlier and look at the shops. I knew that this time I wouldn't be able to stop my gluttony, but I said goodbye and left. On the way I went into a shop and bought biscuits, a packet of cookies, half a kilo of small goodies, mainly chocolate and much more. I ate them all up on the way into town and when I got there I didn't feel well. I was sad and wasn't keen on meeting James. (Both James and Peter are only friends for me, I am not interested in them as boyfriends).

James didn't come; actually I only waited for a few minutes and then went. He phoned just now; he had been standing on the other side and we missed each other, but we shall try again next week. On the way home I intended to buy my favourite salad, but I bought two double hamburgers instead!

My question is: Why just today? My situation is the same as yesterday when I didn't binge. Whatever it is I intend to struggle and not give up.

Susanne (age 22)

Answer:

If you say yes when you mean no, you will binge. You talked to Peter for a long time even though you thought the visit was pointless and you got nothing out of it. Perhaps you also had guilt feelings because you don't like him, but you feel that he likes you.

I think you try to be pleasant and kind to everybody. This means that you probably suppress feelings which you think are unsuitable. Today I believe you wanted to ask Peter to go at once, but you felt you couldn't do it. Perhaps you were unconsciously angry at being compelled to keep company which you felt was pointless. I also believe that you thought it was boring to be with your mother when she was ill and depressed, but you couldn't admit it even to yourself. If you are going to come to terms with your binge eating it is necessary for you to begin to feel and admit your real feelings and take the consequences. This doesn't mean that you need to be unkind, but that you learn to speak your mind in a friendly way. Why keep company with Peter if you aren't happy with him? Give him a chance to meet another girl. Concerning your relation to your mother, it is important that you admit and accept your real feelings for her.

More Information

Sources, references

white filler
Google Adwords ads:

Non-Google ads:
Translate Web4Health
We seek voluntary translators who are interested in translating Web4Health to new languages. We can provide the servers, but we cannot pay for the work done.
web4health.info/en/tr/

Advertise here
Reach 50 000 visitors to all English-language pages in Web4health, reading 100 000 pages for a cost of 100 US $/month.
http://web4health.info/en/ad/